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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

Once you go black you may be more open to dating a second black person.

Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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