- Anti Joke

what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

Windows Vista

How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

women's rights.

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

two fish are in a tank.

Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

What do you call a female duck? A duck.

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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