Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

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I came.

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

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Windows Vista

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

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What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

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Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

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Women's Rights

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Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

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What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

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if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

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A guy is playing cod

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops