Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

Do you know that car over there? No.

why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

Women's rights

Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

dead babies

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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