Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

whats the difference between a black person , spook and a porchmoney.... there is none there all stupid stinky n-ag-ger-s

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

your mother is so lesbian

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What did the moose say to the hunter? I don't know, what? Nothing, a moose is an animal therefore it can't say anything.

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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