Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Got milk? No.

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

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What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

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How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

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When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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