Q. How do you kill a fish A. You don't have to BP already did

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Do you know that car over there? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down +29

An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How did the happy clown die? Testicular Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Patrick is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A British man walks into a dental office.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

do you know what's so funny? yup

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Non-believers.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

KEVIN HART

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A horse walks into a glue factory..

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops