What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? We'll.. Pretty much everything I can think of.

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What do you call a black man with scissors.? A Barber.

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So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

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Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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GAY PEOPLE

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Bin Laden is dead.

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What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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