So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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why did the 8 year old want a squirt gun? his parents were on fire

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So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

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As a wise man once told me... "natives."

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Which one is hardest?

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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hi

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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Jokes are funny.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

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If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

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What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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