Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock It's open, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I LIKE TURLES.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What lives underground? Grandpa

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's white and sticky? Glue

thumb_up thumb_down +14

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Time flies like a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the bunny eat his food

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops