Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

I'm so hungry, I could eat an adequately sized meal

what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

1,2 Freddy's Coming For You 3'4 Better Lock Your Doors 5'6 Grab Your Crucifix 7'8 Stay Up Late 9'10 Never Sleep Again Bonus 11'12 He's Gonna See You In Hell

whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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