What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Whoa! A talking carrot!

WNBA

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Fuck her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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