why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

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why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

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Teen pregnancy

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???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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no u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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