Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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It's your mother, open the door.

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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AVI IS A FAG

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how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

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Your mom is so ugly that your father married her because of emotional, spiritual, and intellectual compatibility, not because of sexual attraction.

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Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

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Pirate ships are used by pirates.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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