Your mum is dead

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

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Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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Hey

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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What do you call an African american in your back yard A slave (I am sorry this is racist)

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Why did the lady drop her shopping Because she ran into coles

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

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Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

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d

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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