Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

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What lives underground? Grandpa

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guess what? chicken butt.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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Mitt Romney for president.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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Can I touch it?

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The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

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FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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Women's rights.

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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