What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

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A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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666 im christian

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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memes

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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Robin, get in the car.

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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look left now look right. washing machine

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whats gay ? you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops