Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

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25

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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What do you call Obama? - the president

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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"Your moms so fat I jiggled my pickle and she jumped with tortoise." Is what I would say if I was retarded. Downvote this shiz!

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What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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