A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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two fish are in a tank.

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What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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How many black guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None can, since noone can work together because they cant see eachother.

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American Idol

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A seal walks into a club.

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The glass is half an hour.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

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Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

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So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

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http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pizza. Pizza who? Delivery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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