What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

whats worse than flunking math? death.

Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

What's white and sticky? Glue

Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

Brittney Spears

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

A Muslim blows up a bar

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

shut up

everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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