What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

what do you call a cup?... a cup

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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