- Anti Joke

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

Pirate ships are used by pirates.

The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

...and I'm a Mormon.

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. I'm calling the police.

What is brown and smells? Poop

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

I heard you let the cat out of the bag. It died.

Knock knock. Who's there? Pizza. Pizza who? Delivery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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