Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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whats gay ? you

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

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Knock Knock. Shut up.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Mitt Romney for president.

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shut up

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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