One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

but there is a road to the super market

So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

What's 1+1? 4.

why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

Wanna hear a joke? No.

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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