What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

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Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

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Time flies like a banana.

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Hey Caleb.

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Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

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Don't rape me!

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A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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