What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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one day tiarnan got banged by a goat

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A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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balls in ya mouf

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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Miscarriages.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

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d

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What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

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What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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