One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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Get in the van

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Water, please.

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What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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Hitler is my role model

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Do you know what's funny? Retarded people.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Your moms so fat, she's not skinny

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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