What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

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whats better than shoes feet

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Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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why did Louisa go black and never go back? She got hit by a truck

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3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

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Knock knock Come in!

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Tacos

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A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

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What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

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You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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A homeless person dies.

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On the last day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... A letter saying she had gone bankrupt, as she had spent all her money buying me 12 pear trees, 35 golden rings, hiring maids and pipers and etc. for over 100 hours, and an innumerable amount of animals.

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What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

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are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

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Black people

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Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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Hey Caleb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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