A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

look left now look right. washing machine

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

What do you call Obama? - the president

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

Knock knock It's open, come in.

Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

a black guy leaves prison

Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

What lives underground? Grandpa

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

guess what? chicken butt.

yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

Tacos

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

why did the chicken cross the road.

Penis in a box.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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