A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

abcdHIV this disease is killing me

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Oh, I must be hearing things.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats worss than getting a papercut gohnnarea

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

thumb_up thumb_down +11

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

thumb_up thumb_down +11

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

thumb_up thumb_down +9

i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops