Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

69

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

thumb_up thumb_down -105

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

thumb_up thumb_down -111

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

thumb_up thumb_down -113

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

thumb_up thumb_down +70

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

thumb_up thumb_down +52

"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops