*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

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why did bully fall of his bike He was eaten by a fridge

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Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

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How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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69

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womens rights!

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Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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