It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

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What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

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Why did Joseph kick the pig in the face? He though it'd be funny.

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The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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What does the black guy say to his black friend? "I like Watermelon, Grape Drink, and Fried Chicken.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

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Get in the van

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What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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but there is a road to the super market

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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