Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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69

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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W.N.B.A.

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Black people are clen.

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Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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