Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

Why was the little girl crying? She got slapped with a porcupine.

haha.

barack osama

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

hi

Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Why did Jenny fail her photography class? Because Jenny has epilepsy and she had a coma while taking the final exam? To this day Jenny is drain dead in the hospital.

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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