Stranger: Greetings. House-owner: No, you were supposed to say, "Knock, Knock". Stranger: Fine. Knock, knock... House-owner: Nobody's home. Stranger: These quirks are really getting on my nerve. Silly antics only serve to frustrate me. Oh, the irony!

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What do I smell like to you?? Crap.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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Small titties.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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How come Emmet Till never attended college? Because he was brutally murdered.

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Women's Golf

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What happened when Chuck Norris tried to divide by zero? He found that he was not very good at math, and moved on to another joke concerning himself.

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The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What is good about the holocaust? It is over

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, sauce on apples.

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What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

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Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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Why? Because!

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What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

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Nickelback.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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