Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

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Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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look left now look right. washing machine

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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WNBA

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

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Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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