What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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women's rights

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

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Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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Q. How do you kill a fish A. You don't have to BP already did

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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Robin, get in the car.

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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