Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

dead babies

Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

Robin, get in the car.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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