Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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Which one is hardest?

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

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A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

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Golf.

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what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

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hi

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man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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Jokes are funny.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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