How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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a little girl gets raped

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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A man walks into a bar. End of story.

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Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops