Jokes are funny.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

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come along children

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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25

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Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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69

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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