What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

a little girl gets raped

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Non-believers.

why did the chicken cross the road.

A horse walks into a glue factory..

Knock Knock. Shut up.

Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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