What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

There is a car full of black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Lets go Detroit Pistons!

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Rebecca Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Jacob Edwards has friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

thumb_up thumb_down +37

why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops