How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -13

there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

My mom's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

what is white and red all over? a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

thumb_up thumb_down -111

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

thumb_up thumb_down +70

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops