What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A simple math problem. If 10% of men are gay, and 20% of men are chinese what is the probability that a man chosen at random spends his free time and meal time both on his knees?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

thumb_up thumb_down -34

how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

thumb_up thumb_down -46

but there is a road to the super market

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

thumb_up thumb_down -108

Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

thumb_up thumb_down +47

what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What s faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

whats round and like a ball a ball

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops