What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

how does peploe get around they walk

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: why did suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock. Q: who's there? A: not suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

guess what? chicken butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +16

You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Avery has crabs.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Giving birth to the antichrist

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Pirate ships are used by pirates.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Miscarriages.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops