Your doorbell is broken.

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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whyo black peopple lie koolade the like the taste

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

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wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

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Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

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Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

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Canada's army

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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My sister has to take a dump

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Golf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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