Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

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Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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Robin, get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

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yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the boy stop playing nintendo 64? He choked on a red M and M and struggled for air until he fell lifelessly on the floor, landing on his pet mole, furthermore, dying and killing the animal as well. It was loose loose situation.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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