What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

What do you do when you're making out with your girlfriend? Play with another dude's ass.

What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

How many feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in, the other to suck a dick.

Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

Womens rights.

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

What do you find....... there's a..........

Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

I HATE EVERYTHING OMG PEOPLE SUCK BOYS SUCK IM TAKING MY RAGE OUT ON THE INTERNET FDJKNDLKXC

Canada's army

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

69

Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

but there is a road to the super market

LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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