Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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W.N.B.A.

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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What's the difference between a black man with a pie and an asian with an apple. They're of different ethnicitiesand cultures, and are holding different foods.

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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