What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Women's Basketball.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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666 im christian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops