Don't rape me!

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Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

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What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

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Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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Whats the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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sweaty black guy

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

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where do the women go? the womanarium

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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What's a thither? My sister with a lisp.

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What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

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Q: Why is the sun so bright? A: Because it reads books!

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

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What is the difference between a black man and a bike? Bikes are not human beings and therefore cannot experience the ups and downs a human being experiences.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Do you like fishsticks? If so you are not a homosexual fish as fishsticks are a frozen food rather than fish genitalia.

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I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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