what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

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"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

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what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

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What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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the chicken whent boomand then died

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Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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