What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

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what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

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What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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I am funny, yes? No, you are not.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

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I love boobs

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Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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