Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

W.N.B.A.

Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

How do you leave a man in suspense...

once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

Knock knock It's open, come in.

Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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