Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Why did the boy stop playing nintendo 64? He choked on a red M and M and struggled for air until he fell lifelessly on the floor, landing on his pet mole, furthermore, dying and killing the animal as well. It was loose loose situation.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

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What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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why did the cow jump over the moon because it was on a high dose of lsd

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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