What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

lewis bedford

Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

I love boobs

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

jewish people like other jewish people.

What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...