What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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i wish i was a tree !

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pizza. Pizza who? Delivery.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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What did the blind, def , dumb kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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A Nazi ran into a Bar.

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How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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My butt!!!!

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How many times does it take a blond to start a car? Usually once; however, the weather may have an impact how well the engine will spark.

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Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

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DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

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one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

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If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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Mexicans working in an office

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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