If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

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What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

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Q: Whats funnier than Ryan Vallee? A: The death of your family -RDV

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

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You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

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Where else? The junk yard

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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Why did the guy kill his friends? He didn't, he doesn't have any friends

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Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

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but there is a road to the super market

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

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A man buys free health care...

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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