What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

your momma is so old, she has heart problems

a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

My mom's dead

a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

what is white and red all over? a ginger

What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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