Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

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Communism ... ... ... ... ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

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Why didn't the black man have a job? He was only in first grade.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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Ben Colbert is gay

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Bumsniffer

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What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

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a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

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Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

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Whats 0+0 0

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Why did Susie fall off a swing? She had an inner ear infection.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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My mom's dead

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a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

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Whats the worst thing that happened in the holocaust? it ended

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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but there is a road to the super market

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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