What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What do you say to a black man who is in your house at night-time, carrying your television? Sir, may you please put down the television as it belongs to me and I worked hard to earn the money to buy it. If you do not I will have to contact the authorities to deal with you in a correct and fair manner.

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how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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W.N.B.A.

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

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How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops