Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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What is brown and smells? Poop

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

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SNICHOLS AND DOOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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Wy do boys like big butts ? Cause it goes in easy :.:

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What do you call a white man in the NBA? A really good basketball player

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

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What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

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Whats worse than living with cancer? Dieing of cancer.

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a guy asks another guy if he likes pepsi or coke the guy says coke and he doesnt agree so he kills him

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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what do you call a retarded child with a doll in his hand while crying and running up a hill in bell bottom jeans in august at night a block of ice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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