Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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your life

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

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Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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whats gay ? you

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

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What is the difference between a black man and a white man? Different skin color.

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lewis bedford

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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