Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

milly, milly, milly, cat

Communism ... ... ... ... ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

Why was the man named Thomas? Because that was his name

Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

Why did the dinosaur jump off the cliff? Because he was mental

Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

Hummer.

How do you fit 90 Jews in a Volkswagen Bug? You can't.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

Water, please.

Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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