- Anti Joke

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock Opens Door

why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

"Your moms so fat I jiggled my pickle and she jumped with tortoise." Is what I would say if I was retarded. Downvote this shiz!

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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