why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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