That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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