A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

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-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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but there is a road to the super market

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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What do you call a red sore on your genitals? Herpes, probably.

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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what has two legs and bleeds? half a dog

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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