How do you make a business man cry? Hit him in the face with a brick

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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

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roses are red violet are blu--- blue? violets are violet! weird, isn't it?

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Friends and Potatoes are similar...if u eat them try die.

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your TV

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What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Their skin color and bank accounts.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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Wanted: A tall, well built woman with good reputation, who can cook Frog's legs, who appreciates a good Fuc- shia garden, classical music and tal- king with out getting too serious. Now read only lines 1,3, and 5

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

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3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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