Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

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I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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jack shine has boobs

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

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whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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