two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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My sister has to take a dump

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Golf.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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What's your name? You tell me.

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops