How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

Women's rights.

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

Do you like fishsticks? If so you are not a homosexual fish as fishsticks are a frozen food rather than fish genitalia.

an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

Hi colton

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

three men walked into a bar, can't believe know one noticed it.

There is a penguin at the bakery: i want 2 loaves said the baker white or brown bread says the penguin does not matter I'm a moped

Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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