Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

Why couldn't the Little Boy hear his mother yelling at him? Because his mothers died

Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

Simon Cowell's hair is real.

Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

Why did the elephant fall into the hot chocolate? It fell off the marshmellow.

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

oops

Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

Your as much use as Anne Frank's drum kit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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