- Anti Joke

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

you are gay

Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

A black horse and a white horse were running through a field. Suddenly, the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. They passed a tree. There was a Russian man sitting under the tree. He said, “Wow, these would make great racehorses!” So he captured them and put them in a race. Right before the gates opened, the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the gates opened and they started to run, but the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the white horse got up and they both kept running. They lost. The Russian decided that they really didn’t make great racehorses, so he set them free. The next day, the black horse and the white horse were running through the field, when the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. Today under the tree, there was a Mexican man. He said, “Wow, these would make great racehorses!” So he captured them and put them in a race. Right before the gates opened, the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the gates opened and they started to run, but the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the white horse got up and they both kept running. Again, they lost, so the Mexican set them free in the field. The following day, the black horse and the white horse were running through the field, when the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. Today under the tree, there was an Italian man. He said, “Wow, these would make such great racehorses!” So he captured them and put them in a race. Right before the gates opened, the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the gates opened and they started to run, but the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the white horse got up and they both kept running. Once again, the horses did not win, so the Italian let them go. The next day, the black horse and the white horse were again running through the field, when the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. Today under the tree, there was an Asian man. He said, “Wow, these would make great racehorses!” So he captured them and put them in a race. Right before the gates opened, the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the gates opened and they started to run, but the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the white horse got up and they both kept running. The horses lost, so the Asian man released them. The next day, the black horse and the white horse were running through the field, when the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. Today under the tree, there was an African man. He said, “Wow, these would make great racehorses!” So he captured them and put them in a race. Right before the gates opened, the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the gates opened and they started to run, but the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the white horse got up and they both kept running. The horses lost again, so the African man released them. The next day, the black horse and the white horse were running through the field, when the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. Today under the tree, there was an American man. He said, “Wow, these would make great racehorses!” So he captured them and put them in a race. Right before the gates opened, the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the gates opened and they started to run, but the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, then the white horse got up and they both kept running. They lost, so the American sadly let them go. The next day, the black horse and the white horse were running through the field, when the white horse fell down, so the black horse came back, and the black horse looked at the white horse, and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the white horse got back up, and they kept running. Today under the tree, there was an platypus. He said, “Wow, these would make great racehorses!” Then the black horse looked at the white horse and the white horse looked at the black horse, and the black horse said, “Wow, a talking platypus!”

whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

milly, milly, milly, cat

one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

Dan O'Driscoll

Religion

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

A van drives into a car.

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

Why was the man named Thomas? Because that was his name

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

A simple math problem. If 10% of men are gay, and 20% of men are chinese what is the probability that a man chosen at random spends his free time and meal time both on his knees?

What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops