how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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no u

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

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Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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