- Anti Joke

What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

a man walks into a bar.......ouch

Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

that awkward moment when you get in the van and there are no sweets...

Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

What's the difference between a white person and a chair? -The chair isn't a complete douche.

Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

corey is a nipplepotomus

where do the women go? the womanarium

Hey what time is it. 3:15

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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