Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

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The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

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What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

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My sister has to take a dump

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

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"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Rebecca Black.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops