A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Why did the elephant fall into the hot chocolate? It fell off the marshmellow.

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why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

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a man walks into a bar.......ouch

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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oops

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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that awkward moment when you get in the van and there are no sweets...

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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Covietz has a large penis

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It's your mother, open the door.

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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