What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

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A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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I'm gay. Great me too.

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

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how do you keep a blond in sespence you dont tell her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops