what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

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What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

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who farted? umm........that guy.

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

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Your doorbell is broken.

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Womens rights.

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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