Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

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How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

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Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

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Fruitcake

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Knock Knock. Shut up.

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What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

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What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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