when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

alcoholism kills

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

What's funnier than a dead baby? We'll.. Pretty much everything I can think of.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cata dont talk.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...