What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

WNBA

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

steves legs

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

Gadaffi

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Hi colton

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

i wish i was a tree !

how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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