roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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...and I'm a Mormon.

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What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The KKK

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A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

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The glass is half an hour.

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There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

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Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

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whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

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Gadaffi

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penisface

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your momma's an antijoke

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What is brown and smells? Poop

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What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops