Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A mexican goes to an ATM.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

when life gives you 100 reasons to cry, you should cry. you're lucky you haven't killed yourself at this point

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Dan O'Driscoll

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So i was walking down the street and this guy was really excited. I said "what is so Exciting?" He said "i just saw Justin bieber kiss a girl."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Your doorbell is broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you fit 90 Jews in a Volkswagen Bug? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What does a mexican do when he gets lost in the woods? He does his best to find food, shelter, and water until a search and rescue operation finds him.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

but there is a road to the super market

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

thumb_up thumb_down -56

What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -80

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops