A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

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What happened to Alice? She fell down a big hole and broke her neck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

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what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

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Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

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You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

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BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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clown penis dot fart? dangle pussy

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!! why not?

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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