Your mother is so obese that the extra weight is putting strain on her knees she now needs knee surgery.

why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

Covietz has a large penis

Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? the wnba

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

penis

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

jokes r dumb

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

I'm not racist... Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...