What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

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what do you call an asian flying a plane? a pilot

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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corey is a nipplepotomus

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What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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...and I'm a Mormon.

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What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The KKK

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A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

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Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

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Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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