What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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A homeless person dies.

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The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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On the last day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... A letter saying she had gone bankrupt, as she had spent all her money buying me 12 pear trees, 35 golden rings, hiring maids and pipers and etc. for over 100 hours, and an innumerable amount of animals.

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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Why did the kid cross the road? He was strapped to a chicken!

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Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

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Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

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How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

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jordan HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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...and I'm a Mormon.

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Hi colton

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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I love you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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