Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

drugs.

Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

what do you call a cup?... a cup

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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