two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

I dislike old people.

Whats the difference between the holocaust and Norm McDonald? One can be laughed at the other is Norm McDonald.

Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

What's not red? No tomatoes.

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

What should I name my dog?

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

Women Drivers.

Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

go go gadget

Haha pizza

Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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