Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

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Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

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69

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why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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lol

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Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

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what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

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Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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