What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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What do you find....... there's a..........

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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Where else? The junk yard

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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What's the diference between an African guy and a lion? Nothing. But the lion will probably eat the African guy.

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Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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Golf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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