There once was a rich man who owned a really big mansion, he's a very organised man and likes routine, every day at 6.30pm he goes for an hour long jog. One day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his mansion is on fire and he can see a little orange man running away in the distance. But he thinks nothing of it. The man has lost a lot of money, but can still afford to move into a slighty smaller, yet still very large house. The next day he goes out for his jog and when he gets back his big house is on fire and again, he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it, but has now lost even more money, and has to move into a regular size house. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his house is on fire and again he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it and has lost even more money. He is really gutted by this point and now has to move into a single bedroom flat. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his flat is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He still thinks nothing of it and has now lost all his money, and has to move into a cardboard box under a bridge. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his cardboard box is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He is sick of this and decides to chase the little orange man. When he catches him he tackles him to the ground, turns him over and asks.. did you burn down my mansion, my big house, my average sized house, my flat, and my box? The little orange man replies no.

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why did the black man walk into KFC? He was terribly hungry and had a reasonable amount of currency with him to purchase food for his well being.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

i have 2 penises

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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