How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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Why did Willy kill the black man? Because not.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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Pirate ships are used by pirates.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

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No.

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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What's funnier than Mexicans? Whats funny about Mexicans?

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Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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Hi colton

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Knock Knock Good one...

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Write your own

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What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

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a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

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Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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