The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

Knock knock! Yes?

a guy asks another guy if he likes pepsi or coke the guy says coke and he doesnt agree so he kills him

What did the blind, def , dumb kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Nicholas Cage

Why did the chicken cross the road? cause' he was annoyed with all the stereotypcial idiots who insist he crosses the road for comical value

Why didn't the black man have a job? He was only in first grade.

lololololololololol

What did Sally get on her 18th birthday? Herpes

What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

So i was walking down the street and this guy was really excited. I said "what is so Exciting?" He said "i just saw Justin bieber kiss a girl."

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Nothing, fishes don't speak, and due to their short memory he's probably forgotten about the event already, although he may have a pretty bad headache

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

How do you fit 90 Jews in a Volkswagen Bug? You can't.

What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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