Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats long and hard? a pole

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

memes

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

thumb_up thumb_down +29

the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Sea World Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

W.N.B.A.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops