A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

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What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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Connor "Rusty" McLeod

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Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

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I dislike old people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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