Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

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There is a penguin at the bakery: i want 2 loaves said the baker white or brown bread says the penguin does not matter I'm a moped

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

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want to go home? yea

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Whats worse than living with cancer? Dieing of cancer.

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Y2K

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What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

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A family of black people get onto a plane. The son said to his father: "Why do planes have wings?" The father then replied by saying: "To help them fly son." The plane's wing then fell off due to a building error, then the plane crashed and everyone on board was killed.

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

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What happened to Alice? She fell down a big hole and broke her neck.

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when life gives you 100 reasons to cry, you should cry. you're lucky you haven't killed yourself at this point

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your moms so fat when she sat on your ipod it turned into an ipad

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your face.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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