If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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What do u say to a blond when she says what a name. i love u baby i hate u baby.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

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A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

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What's the differance between a pile of leaves and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a pile of leaves burning in my backyard.

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what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

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your momma is so old, she has heart problems

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

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Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

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How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What's funny and arousing? This joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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