What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

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the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

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the joke below me is not an anti joke

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

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What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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