Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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Q:why are lamas cool? A:because m&m's are poisoned with deadly dosages of viagra.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

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Go away.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

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your life

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

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Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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