Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

thumb_up thumb_down +28

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

W.N.B.A.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's green, fuzzy, and would likely cause fatal harm if it were to fall on someone? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops