What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

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Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

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Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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Golf.

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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