What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

whats round and like a ball a ball

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

Noah is Smart.

what is white and sticky? glue.

Yo Aodhan yer hands smell of pish

yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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