Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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barack osama

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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What should I name my dog?

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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