What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What break when you talk?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your momma's an antijoke

thumb_up thumb_down +4

No.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

thumb_up thumb_down

A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo momma's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror she decided to get plastic surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -2

you are gay

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops