Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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Why did the kid cross the road? He was strapped to a chicken!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

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What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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if u dislike this u r most likely depressed

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

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I am really good at math debating

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There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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Knock Knock Good one...

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What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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Write your own

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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