What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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What do you call 2 black men sitting on a porch? Craig and Smokey

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a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Dan O'Driscoll

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Nothing, fishes don't speak, and due to their short memory he's probably forgotten about the event already, although he may have a pretty bad headache

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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hi

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Why did Joseph kick the pig in the face? He though it'd be funny.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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