What do u say to a blond when she says what a name. i love u baby i hate u baby.

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what do you call a retarded child with a doll in his hand while crying and running up a hill in bell bottom jeans in august at night a block of ice

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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You know what they say about big feet... big penis.

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A man walks into a bar.

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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Dan O'Driscoll

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Womens rights.

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lol

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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Why did Joseph kick the pig in the face? He though it'd be funny.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

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Justin Bieber

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Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

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Do you know what paper I get?.... Loose leaf :o

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Do you know what's funny? Retarded people.

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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