A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

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Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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What did the mole say? Nothing

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I am a real homosexual

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shut up

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Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

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A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

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When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

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Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

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George W. Bush

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Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

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(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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