A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops