4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

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What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

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What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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Real jokes.

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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666 im christian

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

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What did the black man say to the jewish man? Hello.

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Hello

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. That would never happen because penguins would not be anywhere near a bath-tub at any point in their lives, I would be more concerned wondering why a penguin is in the US and calling animal control than making up a joke about it.

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Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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