A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I love boobs

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Men's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

25

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

69

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops