What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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Women's Basketball.

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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Yo mama so fat she died

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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