Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

9/11/01 walks into a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +21

do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats better than shoes feet

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the koala fall out of the tree it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree it was fit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree it was inside the fridge why did the 6th koala fall out of the tree it was punished for dropping a fridge why did the 7th koala fall out of the tree it committed suicide after framing the 6th koala

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +17

you wanna hear a joke? no

thumb_up thumb_down +17

roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

thumb_up thumb_down +17

ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down +17

a man walks into a bar.......ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

that awkward moment when you get in the van and there are no sweets...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops