Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

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What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

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Sea World Japan.

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What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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a black guy leaves prison

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What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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One Big Ass Mistake America

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What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

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Pianca going ham

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

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I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops