-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A black guy, mexican, and asian walk into a bar. They leave soon after because they heard the "one about them"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a horse and a donkey mixed together? A mule.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops