what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

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God is religiously proven to be real

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car!

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Baseball

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Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

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What time is it? 12:03 AM

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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A plane is flying from NY to Canada, but crashes on the border. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury survivors.... Just kidding, there were no survivors

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

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What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

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What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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Canada

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

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What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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Benevolent villain.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good. The food I placed in the refrigerator a few hours ago will now be cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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