In Soviet Russia, everyone leads a perfectly normal life.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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Did you hear the Joke about the Deaf kid? Neither did he.

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Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

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pubic lice.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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What's the most wonderful time of the year? When your wife dies.

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There is a penguin at the bakery: i want 2 loaves said the baker white or brown bread says the penguin does not matter I'm a moped

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want to go home? yea

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a guy asks another guy if he likes pepsi or coke the guy says coke and he doesnt agree so he kills him

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Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

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What do you call an illegal citizen from the Middle East? Someone seeking a better life in a democratic country after suffering in a communist government for his entire life.

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Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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