Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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Haha pizza

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Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Jeep? Four.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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a black guy leaves prison

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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