What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Whats the worst thing that happened in the holocaust? it ended

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alcoholism kills

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What's the difference between a black man and water? All black men have water in them, but not all water has a black man in it.

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

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Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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