What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

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What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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Wanna hear 2 short jokes and a long joke? Joke, joke , joooooookkkeeee

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

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What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

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Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

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Do you want to come with me? NO! oh i wanted to cum on your face. Thats god damn gay Nope thats god damn sexy.

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No...........

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Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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lol

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Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

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N****R = nice israeli girl great education rich

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How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

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What do you find....... there's a..........

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To return to its nest.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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