My Girlfriend

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A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

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I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

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My life

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A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

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What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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My mom's dead

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What's worse than tieing a baby to a moving fan? Stopping it with a shovel

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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A man is walking down the street when a woman asks "excuse me, have you got the time?" to which the man replies "Yes..yes i do" the woman thanks him, and continues with her time constricted shannigans.

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A father of four joins the military. He returns home after his service.

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. Deez nuts Ok

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What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Satan called. I put him on hold.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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