What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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69

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

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Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

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Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

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What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

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Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

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why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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