What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

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Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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Pickle!

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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