what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Yo mama so fat she died

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W.N.B.A.

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Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

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The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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