Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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Hi colton

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What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

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how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

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i wish i was a tree !

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

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you are gay

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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What happened to Alice? She fell down a big hole and broke her neck.

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How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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