whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

What is 69? A two digit number.

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

W.N.B.A.

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene? An arsonist who happens to be a forest ranger.

A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

God.

Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

One Big Ass Mistake America

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

Mmmmmmm Lemons

Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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