What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

I have read and agree to terms of service.

What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

I dislike old people.

What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

There is a car full of black people.

Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...