Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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What's funnier than Mexicans? Whats funny about Mexicans?

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*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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your momma's an antijoke

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penisface

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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What did little Robbie get for Christmas? AIDS

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

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Yo momma's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror she decided to get plastic surgery.

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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