Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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Noah is Smart.

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What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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What happens when you eat too many breadsticks? You get constipated.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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women's rights

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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