Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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I'm gay. Great me too.

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

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Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops