Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

Women Drivers.

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

Haha pizza

Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

Fruitcake

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...