Whats worse than dieing of Alhzymers? Anal Rape

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Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

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Pianca going ham

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

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why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

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Nickelback.

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The IRS *locking noise*

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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