How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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Sea World Japan.

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

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Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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newt gingrich

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Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

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What is the black mans favorite color? -Time for you to get a watch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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