Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

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George W. Bush

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Women's Rights

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How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

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Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

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Baseball

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roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Write your own

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The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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