How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

A family of black people get onto a plane. The son said to his father: "Why do planes have wings?" The father then replied by saying: "To help them fly son." The plane's wing then fell off due to a building error, then the plane crashed and everyone on board was killed.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Orange!" "Oranges can't speak, who is this really?" "Your neighbor Jake, can I borrow your lawn mower?" "Sure, let me go to the garage and get it for you."

Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

A moth walks into a podiatrist's office, the podiatrist rubs his eyes and looks again and realizes it was just a man taking off his coat in a grandeur fashion.

Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

Mexicans working in an office

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

Your doorbell is broken.

N****R = nice israeli girl great education rich

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

Womens rights.

A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

This desk is two chromebooks wide. It will be one once I push yours off.

What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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