Knock Knock! Who's there? Osama Bin Laden. Oh wait...

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when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

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jack shine has boobs

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I'm not racist... Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy There's the kitchen Sandwich maybe?

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A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

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How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

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Giving birth to the antichrist

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow that's been chopped in half? Dead

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Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

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An Irishman stays home

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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Gadaffi

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why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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