Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

thumb_up thumb_down +37

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats long and hard? a pole

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops