What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

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How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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