What break when you talk?

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what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

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okay.....

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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knock knock come in

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How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

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Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

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a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

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A van drives into a car.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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who farted? umm........that guy.

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Down Syndrome

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*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

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69

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

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Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

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"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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