What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

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Knock knock Who's there? FBI

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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Write your own

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

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The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

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what's brown and sticky? a stick.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

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Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

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Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

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A member of the KKK is walking along the street enjoying the nice weather. He then turns his attention to a black man on the other side of the street and stopped dead in his tracks. He stepped on a land mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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