Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

Pianca going ham

Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

Jewish People

What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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