alcoholism kills

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

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If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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What should I name my dog?

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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