What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

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What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why is jim gay? because he likes men

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What do you call a black person who flys a plane? Well, first ask for their name, then address them as such.

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What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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your momma's an antijoke

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Whats black, white, and read all over? Micheal Jackson reading a book while painting himself red.

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Guess what? Chicken butt? Poultry gluteus maximus!

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A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

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Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

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Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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Whats worse than living with cancer? Dieing of cancer.

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The biggest lie on earth: I have read and agree to the terms of use.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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