Nicholas Cage

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

When did the black man go to the pharmacy and why ? His wife , for whom he cared very much , had a cold and he had to get her prescription for her . On top of that , he had a horrible problem problem with painkillers that caused him to have an aneurysm on the way there .

Why was it so easy for Superman to pick up chics? His butt ox.

Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

whats red white and blue? i dont know

What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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