Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is the saddest color? Red because his family recently was killed

thumb_up thumb_down -29

When is a joke funny? When you read it.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

alcoholism kills

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

thumb_up thumb_down +108

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +106

If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +60

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

I am black.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops