A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

the awkward moment when Rick Astley gives you up

-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

whats round and like a ball a ball

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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