Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

whats round and like a ball a ball

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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