A bar walks into your mother.

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

justin littleton. nuff said

One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

yo mama so fat she's fat

Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Your mum is dead

Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was black

Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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