A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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A bar walks into your mother.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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justin littleton. nuff said

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

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Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

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Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

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I am a real homosexual

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How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

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Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

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Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

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jess is a drama queen am i right rishi ?

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What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Giving birth to the antichrist

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Your mum is dead

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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Do you know what Chuck Norris does for a living? He's an actor, I also heard he's quite good with martial arts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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