What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

What's 1+1? 4.

Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Mmmm, donuts

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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