I dislike old people.

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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barack osama

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-Knock knock -Come on in!

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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Why did the black man walk into KFC? He was terribly hungry and had a reasonable amount of currency with him to purchase food for his well being.

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

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What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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the joke below me is not an anti joke

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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