Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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Your life That's the joke

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Noah is Smart.

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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Why did the black guy hate the white guy??? Because the white guy enslaved his ancestors.

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

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Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

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whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

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Yo mama so fat she died

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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