A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

where's waldo? in a picture book.

What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

lewis bedford

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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