An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

If you are going down the road in your boat and the pedal falls off how many cheese burgers can you eat 21 because a motorcycle doesnt have doors.

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

9/11/01 walks into a bar

What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

your all shit at jokes

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

Women's rights.

a show horse jumps over a bar

How many Chinese men people does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Anyone can screw in a light bulb, regardless of race or gender.

what did the black man do for his family? nothing

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

Kim Kardashian.

What do you call a file named pedo? A. Pedobear B. Toast C. Pedofile

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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