(insert Anti-Joke here)

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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Aodhan Hearty

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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Why isn't this joke funny Because i have cancer

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

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a Mexican and a black guy were sitting in the back of a car, who is driving? -- a cop

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

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A ginger rapping.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Baseball

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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Guess what? Chicken butt? Poultry gluteus maximus!

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a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

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A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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