Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

The WNBA

If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

Once upon a time there was a little puppy. He then grew old and died.

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

Whats long and hard? a pole

A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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