69

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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this website...

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

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Mmmm, donuts

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Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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the joke below me is not an anti joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops