Q: How did the blonde commit suicide? A: She shot herself in the head.

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how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

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Whats funnier than an anti joke? a real one.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Do you know what paper I get?.... Loose leaf :o

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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My sister has to take a dump

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

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What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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-Knock knock -Come on in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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