Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

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Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

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What has human male genitalia? A human male

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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Go away.

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25

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

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9:11 make a wish

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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