Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

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Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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