Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I scream. You scream. We all scream.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the jew break his iPhone? He dropped it when i shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call two guys hanging by your window? Kurt and Rod

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So a magician was driving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops