A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

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Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

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Why didn't Sally eat the meatballs The meatballs ate her

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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What comes after "Q" R

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

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What's black and white and red all over? Lots of things, including certain ugly clothing.

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What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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thomas hall= fuckin dikc

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what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

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Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops