What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

go go gadget

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

Knock Knock Come In! Who me? Yeah. Ok.

What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...