roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

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what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

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why did the man die? he got shot

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

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Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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