Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

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Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "My son was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer."

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What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

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What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

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what do you call an asian flying a plane? a pilot

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

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why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow that's been chopped in half? Dead

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What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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a Mexican and a black guy were sitting in the back of a car, who is driving? -- a cop

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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What did little Robbie get for Christmas? AIDS

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Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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