Roses are Red, violets are blue, I have STD, Now so do you. :3

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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Rob Bell

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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69

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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