Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

I dislike old people.

How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

-Knock knock -Come on in!

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Real jokes.

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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