what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A Kinect

It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

penis

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

How do you know when a guy wants to have sex with you? When he rapes you

What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was about to get raped.

What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

newt gingrich

A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

anus soup

One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

what is the difference between a black person and a picnic bench? A picnic bench can support a family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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