A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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Your mother gets so hungry, she eats.

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What did one guy say to the other guy?? Well he just hi but hi backwards is ih and that reminded him of his days in Nahm because that's what his Sargent said and that reminded him of ice-cream because his Sargent smelled like ice-cream and that reminded him of the song that the ice-cream played which reminded him of Disney world which reminded him of a priest raping little boys which mad him laugh because that reminded him of a Jew picking up a penny which reminded him of Osama be shot in the f**k**g face and that reminded him to say how are you to the other guy.

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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what do a plum and a rabbit have in common? there both purple except for the rabbit

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Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

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How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

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Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

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you wanna hear a joke? no

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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A: Want to hear a funny joke? B: Nah, I'm okay

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Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

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What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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