Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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9/11/01 walks into a bar

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What comes after "Q" R

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

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What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

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What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

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Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

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how do you make a blonde laugh on friday tell her shes a blonde on monday

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What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

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Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

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Q.Why was 6 crying? A.Because 7,8,9

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there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

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What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

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This post contains NOTHING.

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Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

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What did the mother say to her baby? These little piggies taste good!

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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