two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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nice shorts.

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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Niko isnt a mexican douche

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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The geese of Growmore

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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I won the game.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops