Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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Waseem likes to talk with his mouth full.

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You're so straight!

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The WNBA

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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GONNA

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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9/11

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops