Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who?

Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

a duck walked into the 7-11, grabbed a slurpee and told the man at the register, "put it on my bill". But the man behind the counter was Indian, and could not understand what the duck was saying. The duck then walked out confused, wondering why he was buying a slurpee in the first place

Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Well it's really nice.

Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

PENIS

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

hi my name is? joe

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

Knock knock? Whose there? Who's. Who's who? No you used the wrong form of who's.

How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

if u r not my friend, like this joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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