knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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Benevolent villain.

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25

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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What do you call 2 black men sitting on a porch? Craig and Smokey

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whats bigger than a 4 school bus pile up? genocide.

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

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What do you get when an Alabama and an LSU kid are mixed?A small child who grows up in a world of fighting and domestic violence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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