Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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^that joke's not funny

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

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what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

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why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

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What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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